olsen family blog

Allez Cuisine!

2007-03-31T22:39:00.000-07:00

Last night Adam and I had a little cook-off with my family! It was a little spin off of the Food Network's Iron Chef TV show.

Each couple competed to bake/cook one of four courses. It was actually pretty cool because right after they released what dish we would cook with a special ingredient we had 30 minutes to plan out what we would make. Then we had an hour or so to make it.

Adam and I came out on top with our well-plated, fresh approach to Parmesan stuffed chicken! It was such a great date night--I totally recommend it. http://www.classycuisine.com/

Hare Krishna Festival of Colors

2007-03-26T00:02:00.000-07:00

For the last few years I've wanted to visit the Hare Krishna Temple in Spanish Fork, but never got around to it. So when I heard about this year's Festival of Colors I marked it in my planner and committed to go.

The afternoon was fun. The temple was really pretty. We were surrounded by a large amount of people, and actually Llamas. There was belly dancing, effigy burning and the traditional throwing and smearing of colors, which symbolizes bringing in spring and throwing out winter. Obviously, there are a lot more details but that about sums it up. It was good to mingle with friends of another faith.

Enjoy the pictures.

St. Patrick's Day 2007

2007-03-18T23:22:00.000-07:00

Any resemblance to Gaston?

2006-12-18T12:24:00.000-08:00

Christmas at the Morinda Gardens

2006-12-10T15:06:00.000-08:00

Family Book Club

2006-12-05T18:24:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let everyone know that there are two copies of "The Wayward Bus" sitting in our living room. I even made a trip to the Orem Public Library for the first time since high school to get it! We started it last night, and are excited to read more about the adventures of Johny Chicoy and "Sweatheart." I hope everyone's aboard...

Happy Holidays

2006-11-26T14:45:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays everyone! Here are some pictures from our Thanksgiving break.
We can't wait to see y'all at Christmas time! Go Cougars!

YES!!!

2006-11-25T17:03:00.000-08:00

Welcome

2006-11-08T09:49:00.000-08:00

I hate to beg...

2006-11-05T23:02:00.000-08:00

But come on, I thought that piece about election day was at least mildly amusing, and I was sure that it would inspire a comment or two. I thought I'd be able to count on at least one chastisement from Adam about my apathy towards voting. And yet I have been checking the blog multiple times a day in vain. Guys, I am hundreds of miles away-- I need some sort of validation here. This needs to be a two way street, I respond to your posts, and you respond to mine thereby making it all the more enjoyable to post in the future. Maybe if this were another family (I won't mention names) I would understand, but frankly I expected more from the Olsens.

Tsk tsk.

A very happy couple...

2006-11-02T20:32:00.000-08:00

Preach it!

2006-11-02T18:11:00.000-08:00

Testify!

Election Day

2006-11-02T09:48:00.000-08:00

November's election day is my favorite day all year. It has been promoted above Christmas as of this year. Election day is my very favorite day of the year because it is the day that political ads stop infiltrating my television and streets. It all starts slowly enough but it seems as though the sheer volume of the ads becomes more and more dense as the day draws near until I am ready to commit myself to the nearest asylum for the month of October. And for someone as indecisive and unpolitical as I am, it is very trying.

"Bill lied on his tax form, vote for me Ted."
"Ted doesn't know what he is talking about, but he does oppose abortion, even if it jeopardizes the life of the mother, vote for me Bill."
"Bill wastes your hard earned taxes on construction projects that don't enhance your life, vote for me Ted."
"Ted has no experience in congress, and he hates puppies, vote for me Bill."
"Bill thinks I hate puppies just because I love cats, but I happen to know that he steals candy from children, vote for me Ted."
"That was an isolated incident, and I didn't swallow the candy, I only chewed, vote for me Bill."

Don't even get me started on the propositions. Just a few more days, I'm so excited! My paper chain is getting smaller! Well, I hope you all enjoy your election day as much as I will enjoy mine, you can be sure that I will be celebrating by choosing not to vote, as is the tradition for me.

I am Allison Hallstrom, and I approve this message.

2006-11-02T09:28:00.000-08:00

Ok everyone, here are the kiddos before the Halloween run, Greta didn't mind the antannae and they lasted all night. It was a Halloween miracle! Sarah, I loved your pictures, what cute nephews I have! Andy, I'm more than a little bit disappointed that you have no Halloween pictures up, especially after the call for pictures you gave... I want to see Isaac and Seth!!!

Opening jokes never work

2006-11-01T14:43:00.000-08:00

olsen family blog

2006-11-01T07:10:00.000-08:00

olsen family blog

HELP.
Ok guys. I need step by step instructions on how to post photos. I have photos on my hard drive in various files. How do I post them.

On another topic, I would like each of you to get me your available vacation dates from May through July. Give me all the days/weeks you have open during that time frame.
Thanks
Dad

My first

2006-10-31T20:16:00.000-08:00

Well after Andy suggested pictures I couldn't resist posting (yes for the very first time) pictures of my Halloween duo. Surprisingly, Sam didn't cry when I put him in this costume. I am 99% sure that he ate some feathers but it was well worth the Kodak moment. And although you didn't hear it I think Adam, Becky, Mom, Dad, Sam, and Aaron would tell you that James had a pretty impressive lion roar.

Viva Las Vegas!

2006-10-30T13:58:00.000-08:00

Ad and I went to Vegas this weekend for a Dave concert. We had a great time at the concert, ate at In-n'Out and well not much else. I've come to the realization that there isn't much to do in Vegas after midnight if you are two married Mormons.

We need pictures!

2006-10-29T18:28:00.000-08:00

Allright everybody, its time to step up the blog into phase II. We have all contributed more or less to the famliy blog, and now that we are approaching six months of being on air we need to think introspectively. Let's not forget the purpose of the blog - keeping the Olsen family together and informed. What we need is more information on the kids, work, and family triumphs (lets stay away from the family christmas letter boasting...). Also remember to keep the complaining to a minimum because as they say - '50% of people don't care and the other 50% are glad you are suffering'. But what we really need is pictures. So lets get back to the basics and post the good stuff. All it takes is a digital camera and a USB wire - lets get going.

Musings From Dad

2006-10-24T07:12:00.000-07:00

I have to admit, I have no idea what I am doing. When I see your contributions with photos etc. it makes me feel kind of stupid because I don't have the slightest idea how to do that. It use to not bother me, but more and more it kind of bugs me that I'm so ignorant.

I'm in Oslo, Norway today, sitting in my Hotel Room trying to shake a bad head cold. I've taken the day off today trying to get feeling better. I'm in a hotel in Central Oslo that has a pretty good view of the city and water front. Oslo is at the end of a large Fjord and the view going out to sea today is spectacular. The leaves are at the height of color and everything looks very beautiful. It is getting cold here and is snowing in the higher elevations. I walked a bit today, up to the palace and through the central shopping district of Oslo. Like every European City, it has so much history, old classic buildings etc. The National Theater, Opera House, University, Parliment etc. Kind of cool to walk around.

This past weekend I was in Dubrovnik, Croatia. I had no idea what this place was but it was so amazing. It is situated on the Adriatic Sea Coast and is absolutely beautiful. It is a small city that is cut in the face of a hill leading down to the sea and just off shore are many tiny islands. Cruise Ships make regular stops here and in fact my hotel was situated right in line with a regular Cruise Ship anchorage. There is an Old City here with huge walls surrounding and inside it is probably much like it was for centuries. I wish you all were with me to see this. Seeing these things is so much more fun when you are all with me.

Before Dubrovnik, I was in Beijing. We had a huge TNI event at the Great Hall of the People!!! I couldn't believe we pulled that off. The same building where Nixon first met Mao in 1972. It was really cool because before the big TNI event, we were escorted into a VIP room where some very special dignataries were brought to meet us. I met Mao's personal physician and some other high ranking government officials. They liked the fact that I speak Chinese. We had a chance to visit the Great Wall. Until you see this, you cannot possible believe it. 6000 miles and the structure itself is impossible to describe. To think it was built 2500 years ago really is amazing.

I think about all of you all the time and hope you are doing well. I know that each of you have your daily worries and challenges as well as joys and triumphs. I remember so well when I was a young dad and husband just finishing school being terrified at the responsibility of raising a family and providing for them. I remember when mom and I bought our first home in Payson, we had to pay $500 down and we could barely come up with it. When I signed the papers i thought I'd been thrown into prison for 30 years. Through the years there were always things to try us and it seemed that we always had the ability to work it all out.I always told your mom that as long as she was with me, I could do anything. I still feel that way.

It is hard on us to see you all scatter. First Andy and Jessica, then Jon and Ali, next year Aaron and Sarah. . . Hopefully we'll hold on to Adam and Becky for a while. We are so proud of you for finding your way in the world. We always hope that you never forget your way back home. We love you and over the years have become addicted to you. When I think of each of you: Andy entering the 4th year of Med. School with a new baby and the anticipation of finding a residency program, Jon and Ali moving to a new city, beginning a new office, Aaron pursuing his dreams that will certainly take him to far flung places, and Adam and Becky just getting started in their life together, we pray for you and want each of you to know that we are with you always. Our home is yours, always, our whole life is wrapped up in yours and always will be.

Now some meaningful comments:
I hate Utah. In fact I can't express how much I hate Utah. I don't care who they are playing or what the circumstances, I want them to lose and lose big. If BYU loses to Utah this year, It may cause a reaction in me that I cannot pull out of.

If you read the European Press, you will get the idea that all Europeans hate Americans. I can tell you that this is not the case. The press hates Americans, but actually the American Press does also. I can tell you that one of the frustrations felt by Europeans is that they can't vote in our elections. It is interesting to me that every European has an opinion about Pres. Bush and are very willing to express it. When was the last time you were sitting in Cafe Rio and overheard people getting all animated about Prime Minister Blair, or German Chancellor Merkyl, or whoever the French President is (Chirac?). Fact is, we really don't care one way or the other and wish they would afford us the same courtesy.

I read today in the European Press how they are getting all upset because of the "World Series". We call the winner the World Champions even though only American Teams qualify to participate. Look, its our game and we can call it whatever we like.

Anyway guys, I hope you are all well and happy. I am really looking forward to seeing you all soon for Thanksgiving or Christmas. It will be great.
Dad

Cell phones are the new cigarettes

2006-10-19T07:40:00.000-07:00

The cell phone goes from annoying to evil.

Happy Birthday Adam!

2006-10-17T19:50:00.000-07:00

Happy, happy birthday Ad! I love you so much! Hope you had fun today.

2006-10-13T11:54:00.000-07:00

Where is my global warming!!

2006-10-13T11:31:00.000-07:00

Every year in Ohio there is that week in October where you are enjoying the nice 60 degree weather with the golden brown leaves and nice after school jogs. Then you go to wake up one morning to realize that there are no more 60 degree days. Now you are praying to break the 50's. It litteraly happens overnight -- and that night was last tuesday night.

I paid good money to get global warming and was assured of a 2-3 degree boost. Now the cold is here again and I'm not happy.

Random Sunday Thoughts...

2006-10-08T17:36:00.000-07:00

We had a new couple move into the ward a couple of weeks ago - newly married. Why is it that ever since we started having kids we look at childless couples with contempt? Its like they somehow are getting away with something. They need to suffer like the rest of us...

We are going through Isaiah in Sunday school which pretty much alienates 90% of the class. Someone reads a large chunk of scripture and the teacher throws out 'now what does that mean to you?' (crickets) I've found that saying: 'the lord will destroy the wicked and gather the righteous' is almost always right on in an interpretation of Isaiah.

Our sunday school teacher is an engineering professor, so we somehow ended up being lectured about designing a foundation for a building in excruciating detail for 20 minutes. He was using words like 'zero-zero quardenants' and stuff. I think Jesus was the zero-zero quardenant on which we construct or something. This brings up one disadvantage of a lay church - everyone interjects their profession into the lesson. Why don't you just stand up at the beginning of class and say 'before we begin, I just want to say that I am a very acomplished engineer. Now turn with me to Isaiah...'

Isaac outsmarts me on a regular basis. Today I had an argument with him for almost 5 minutes whether the lemonade we were making qualified as 'scary lemonade'. He just pulls you right in.

Yesterday Jessica went to Day Out for women, which is a deseret book convention. She was hobnobbing with the who's who of LDS women while I stayed home with the two kids all day. After a few hours clothes were strewn about the floor, Isaac was making 'orange juice pie' and singing at the top of his lungs, (seth was of course as calm as a summers day), and I realized something was wrong. All I am saying is that if I stayed home with the kids every day, either I or Isaac would be behind bars before the end of the year. (I'm betting on the former)

I enjoyed listening to the old fashioned butt-kicking over the weekend in LaVelle Edwards Stadium. San Diego State University was absolutely unforgettable playing the role of the 'butt'.

I've survived

2006-10-06T22:42:00.000-07:00

It's the beginning of October and I'm proud to say I've successfully survived the first month of school. It's been crazy considering my sixteen credits, which include a three credit class that I spend 15-20 hours per week in (News Reporting for Daily Universe which really should be a five credit class...it's quite ridiculous) and a new job/internship. But I will say the best thing I've done so far this semester is adopted a new "No Homework on the Weekends" policy. Adam convinced me of it and it has given me pure sanity. Anyway, I've posted some pictures from my birthday and the BYU vs. Tulsa game. Go Cougars!

Don't sing it, bring it.

2006-10-06T10:17:00.000-07:00

I want to use this blog as a forum to issue this challenge: I will face anyone at anytime in Racquetball; just tell me when and I'll be there with a jock strap and laser beam eyes. The Olsen court is my new home, and I am currently undefeated. Don't worry, though, I'll be a fighting champion. If anyone wants the crown, come to 313 Stonegate Lane and attack me with everything you have.

A Rebirth

2006-10-05T07:43:00.000-07:00

My love of the Cougars has been well documented. I don't think I need to tell everyone again how devoted I am to BYU football and basketball. I do, however, feel the need to express another sports team from my past that I have rediscovered: The Utah Jazz.

After '97 and '98, I didn't think I'd ever have the love I had for the Jazz. We had our chance and we blew it two years in a row (even though Jordon pushed off. You know he did, don't try to deny it). I didn't follow the Jazz much the last few years, but last year the spark was there. After watching the second game against the Detroit Pistons, witnessing that overtime win over the best team in the league, I felt something I haven't felt in years: The Love.

Now I'm watching the camp notes like a hawk. In the democracy of my sports world, Dee Brown, Ronnie Brewer and Paul Millsap have become my supreme court. Matt Harpring is the Secretary of defense, and AK 47 is my minister of pain. The Jazz are on the rise again, my friends. The season of bottom-dwelling is over, and I'm already thinking about how I can score tickets to some playoff games.

Get on the bandwagon now, and feel the love.

New Horizons

2006-10-01T20:39:00.000-07:00

Well, We are here in Arizona everyone, and so far it just feels like a really weird vacation. Probably because we are still in a hotel, and will be until Thursday. We have an odd amalgamation of belongings with us in our hotel room, and the rest is hopefully on a truck somewhere in Arizona. So far, we have made a few observations: We miss the mountains, we didn't realize how mountainous utah valley was, but we miss seeing them when we look at the horizon. Also, it has been brought to my attention how completely un-diverse Utah is. I have seen many races, much skin, and various habits pertaining to the lack of health (A.K.A. Smoking).

We are definitely not in Utah anymore, Todo.

We are loving it, but like I said, it still just feels like a vacation. It has cooled off here to a downright chilly autumn 100 degrees daytime and 94 at night, so we are dusting off our winter clothes, and preparing for the long cold winter. We have our food storage just in case it dips below 80 and we have to stay indoors. Don't worry about us, we are thick skinned.

Gabe is anxious for his toys again, and we are all anxious to settle into our new home. There is a nice park just down the street with lots of grass and a playground, which is nice since we left our playground in Utah, and we are looking into the idea of artificial grass in our yard. Let the HOA take care of the grass I say! So that's life in Surprise! Arizona (yes the exclamation mark is actually part of the name, but I don't think it's required on postage)

more updates to come!

Conference roundup - Saturday morning

2006-09-30T12:59:00.000-07:00

thoughts on conference...

First of all I like the ohio state scarlet and grey ties that the choir is wearing. Go Buckeyes - beat Iowa!!

Opening Remarks - President Hinckley.

...President Hinckley has aged alot since his cancer opperation. I think he went through a really tough year, but he seems wiser, kinder, more contemplative -- we'll see how this plays out.
...the church grew ALOT in the 80's and 90's. Some have criticized that the numbers are down but I think we have been playing catch up in the last 10 years- we have grown in so many ways other than numbers. I think we still have some growing pains in the next ten years but we are laying the foundation.

Oaks

He lays the hammer down. I like it. He tackles the homosexual issue like Nixon tackled the TCU quarterback on Thursday -- causing a turnover and loss of downs.

Solid talks from the 70's. I like the Scottish guy.

Ballard

Preach it to me Ballard!!! Principles more important than numbers! Don't let guilt motivate you! Dave Wardell are you listening?

Faust

zzzzzz... zzz... I'll have to catch it on the internet.

And God said unto Moses...

2006-09-24T16:52:00.000-07:00

...Thou shalt earn thine Eagle Scout before the age of 15.

Let me set the scene for you: Friday afternoon I started to hear the news reports -- flash flood warning in Southern Ohio for Friday night, and Saturday morning. This is when I started to get hopefull - 'maybe I will come home to the news that the scout camp this weekend is cancelled!' No such luck. I got home, went to the store and bought a dozen doughnuts, a bag of Fritos, and a pre-packaged sandwich and set off with a change of socks and a change of pants in my backpack. I hadn't been camping in what seems like 10 years.

At this point it had been raining steadily for about 10 hours and the forecast called for steady downpours and the aforementioned flash flood warning. I had a foam mattress, and a borrowed sleeping bag. I felt like I was 13 years old again. "This will be good," I was told on the way up, "We will be able to show our firebuilding skills in the damp weather".

Our scout troop is made up of four boys, three of which are on high dose prescriptions of Adderall. One knows birds like the pope knows the bible. Every sound we heard -- 'that was a minnowing warbler' he would say. He also read the billboards out loud the entire 2 hour drive to the campsite.

When we got to the campsite we hurried and set up our tents -- it is tough to hammer tent stakes into pure water but we did our best. Then the challenge was to build the campfire. (I had allready eaten my fifth doughnut at this point.) I made the mistake of entering into the roped off axe area without asking 'may I enter' and hearing 'yes, you may'. So I got yelled at from the other leader. We used lighter fluid to get the fire started which set off a lecture from the main leader about how he once knew a guy that tried to douse a fire with gasoline and the fire travelled up the stream of gasoline and blew up the gas can. He apparently is really disfigured to this day. Then as we were eating charred hot dogs somebody was pulling the lid off of his dutch oven and talking to us about how he had just 'seam sealed' his tent the week before to make sure that he stayed dry tonight. At that point I realized that I forgot to 'seam-seal' my own tent. Not to mention I left my dutch oven behind. I ate another doughnut and went to work on my fire 'em 'n chit. I didn't really want my fire 'em 'en chit, but I went anyway to try to start a fire with no paper, and only a few matches and damp wood.

After a night of soggy sleeping I got up and learned that the days activities lasted until 5:00 Saturday afternoon. This was the point when the other leaders in our ward approached me to let me know that they have 'obligations' and had to get home early. So I was in it for the long haul. So I fed the kids a bag of marshmellows, three large hershy's chocolate bars, and the remaining six doughnuts for lunch and after the nature hike in which we successfully identified a fern, a caterpiller, a bird of some sort, and a few insects, we headed home. I am beginning to think that I was the sacrificial lamb in this whole ordeal.

Al Mormon

2006-09-22T06:59:00.000-07:00

This is a funny video, if you have a few minutes take a look.

In this Corner... The Iron Sheik!!

2006-09-21T08:55:00.000-07:00

Remember when Iran was an innocent country represented by the Iron Sheik? He lived throught the 'glory days' of the WWF. He had memorable feuds with Hulk Hogan, 'Hacksaw' Jim Dugan, Sgt. Slaughter, and other notables. He was even the leader of the bad guys on the wrestling cartoon that I used to watch in the old days. It was also the Sheik though, that exposed wrestling. In May 26, 1987 the Iron Sheik and Jim Duggan were arested for drunk driving, possession of marjijuanna, and cocaine by the New Jearsey Police. The most shocking thing about this arrest was not that two wrestlers were arrested for drug possession, or even that they were drunk driving. No, the most shocking thing about this was that the 'Iron Sheik' and 'Hacksaw' Jim Duggan were actually in the midst of a bitter fued in the wrestling world. How were two enemies sharing a beer (and more?) together in the same car? This upset the wrestling world. The Iron Sheik was not what he seemed.

Now we see another Iranian who really is in the midst of a real feud, and who really is an enemy, but we shrug him off as if he were speaking to 'Mean Gene' Okerlund before a wrestling match. The difference is: that was fake, this is real.

Mischievous Character Displayed in Museum of Peoples and Culture

2006-09-20T10:04:00.000-07:00

By Becky Olsen - 19 Sep 2006

*I'm putting this up on the blog for Becky. It's one of her articles found in the Daily Universe*

Once in a while when office manager Nicole Thompson opens the galleries at the Museum of Peoples and Cultures she is a bit surprised, even taken aback when she sees a silhouette of a man with a hat and cane. She breathes deeply and tells herself, "It's just Maximon."

Although Maximon, pronounced mah-shee-mon, is dressed in pantaloons, shirt, tie and a hat and carries a cane, it is hard for Thompson to remember that he is made of wood.

Known as the God of the Underworld to the indigenous Mayan people in Guatemala, Maximon is a modern personification of the pre-Columbian Mayan god Maam. In the 16th and 17th centuries Maam evolved into Saint Simon with the emergence and dominance of Catholicism. Today, many who worship him call him Maximon, which is a combination of Simon and max, the Mayan word for tobacco.

"He is a very interesting and busy man," said student-curator Julie MacDonald. "He plays multiple roles. He is Maam, god of the underworld, San Simon, and ,during Lent, he even takes the role of Judas Iscariot."

Maximon sits on a throne in the corner of a case titled "Feasting with the Gods," which is part of the "Seeking the Divine" exhibition. He was perfect for what the museum wanted to teach visitors, MacDonald said. This specific case and its artifacts explore how food is central to the very existence of humanity and how it has always been an essential element of ritual and ceremony.

Maximon is the deity of fertility, death, healing and male sexuality. His followers celebrate his reign on the Wednesday following the first Sunday after Spring Equinox or, in laymen's terms, the Wednesday before Easter. On this feast day in Guatemala he is carried on the shoulders of his "human horse" throughout the streets and given many offerings.

"I always highlight him when I give tours," said Tammy Messick, a collections aide at the museum. "He is a great representation of how people worship gods and how they appease them."

Appeasing Maximon is a must.

"He [Maximon] is known to be a bit of a mischievous character and even has a dark side," MacDonald said. "He must be appeased with offerings like tobacco, alcohol, money, silk scarves, tortillas and even Coca-Cola."

Staff at the museum know this first hand.

The museum was having problems putting up the exhibition at the time Maximon arrived. Pieces would inexplicably move within the display case.

"We called the owners and told them about the situation," said Glenna Nielsen, acting director of the museum. "They encouraged us to place the offerings next to [Maximon], and in no uncertain terms he was threatened and told to behave, and we haven't had any problems since then."

What: Maximon, in Seeking the Divine exhibit

Where: Museum of Peoples and Cultures, 700 N. 100 East, Provo (one block south of Brick Oven)

When: Monday - Friday, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m.

I'm just proud of my wife, that's all.

Where have we seen this before?

2006-09-16T18:03:00.000-07:00

John Beck passes for 400+ yards, 100+ rushing yards, BYU outgains opponent substantially, wins the turnover battle, and the defense outplays expectations. The only thing they lose is... the game. (O.K. listen I realize that this is appears to be turning out to be a sports blog, but since Adam and I seem to be the only ones reading it, and since I just wasted $21.00 and 4 hours let me vent.) After this I will get back my regular posting, (or nothing at all -- maybe I'll just send Adam an E-mail.)

In response to Adam's 10 reasons for BYU's victory, here are 10 observations from the game:

1. John Beck doesn't have IT.

This is no knock on John Beck -- he is a great quarterback. He is very accurate and efficient. He is just not the 'step-on-your-throat' kind of guy. BYU will still win with him, but they wont win these kind of games with him. Lets just get over it. The next time I am in Provo, I am going to do a little experiment: I am going to get a $10,000 doller rollex with a note on it reading 'John, it's all yours -- enjoy!' Then I will put it on his doorstep and ring the door and run. I just want to see what he will do. Will he take the watch put it on and go inside the house and lock the doors, or will he look at it, try it on and lose it on his way back in? Just wondering.

2. Bronco is a better coach than Crowton.

This isn't saying much. I still don't think Crowton practiced in the weeks leading up to Colorado State, Boise State, Utah, (ok I'll stop). I was always waiting for Crowton to say in the post game interview 'Uh... I think we got the wrong game film this last week. I thought we were playing Wyoming.'

3. 3-3-5 defence didn't work for the cougars.

they're just better now. I am kind of excited about this. BYU with a great offense and consistent defence is hard to beat.

4. BYU's running game is really good, but not great.

this isn't a knock its actually a positive. They just aren't great, yet.

5. Bronco keeps talking about execution, but they get like 6 or 7 delay of game penalties per game that kills drives.

just an observation.

6. Football and golf achieve the same results.

4 hours and 20 bucks down the drain. Net result: frusteration.

7. I have to spend some more man on man time with Isaac.

He printed off a cutout from the internet of a little girl with different outfits and handbags. For the entire second quarter, I was disapprovingly cutting out paper dresses and blouses for Isaac to try on his cut-out daisy girl. At one point I asked him 'don't they have any football men to try on helmets or pads?' This idea was surprisingly turned down. I am happy to report, however, that I caught Isaac playing with very large army vehicles at a barbeque later on tonight. He even tried unsuccessfully to grab the tank from an older boy -- but he made me proud.

8. If Doman were still quarterback...

last year we would have won TCU, Utah, (I'm drawing a blank), and this year we would have won, Arizona, and Boston College. Period. Nothing against Beck, I am sure he will make a great husband and father. Doman would have dove for it on third down, scrambled to find the open man etc. I am not suggesting Beck lost any of these games, but he didn't 'win' any of them.

9. I don't like BYU as much as Jarren Smith.

He was visibly hurt after the game.

10. Didn't they have any winterfresh gum for our kicker?

two chances to win it all. What's up with the gum thing though? The guy missed two extra points and was spraying it all around the field. He was worried about his gum? I liked what Spielman said 'tell him to forget the gum and if he misses another he's sitting on the bench'.

Ok now I feel better. I think BYU is better than they have been in years. Even better (sans Doman) than they were in 2001. Here's looking to beating up on worse teams!

Note to BYU: why not implement the option? I thought Beck was a running threat. And finally, lets get back to the BYU of old -- schedule chump teams for us to beat up on -- everyone likes a winner! Lets get back to the pre Clubber Lang Rocky Balboa!

Top ten reasons why BYU will beat BC

2006-09-12T20:05:00.000-07:00

To quote Rev. Hammer: brothers and sisters the pride is back! Start flying your car flags, buy your blue body paint and write an angry letter to CSTV, because BYU football is back. After a rout of defending C-USA champion Tulsa, BYU is heading out to the East coast to take on the Boston College Golden Eagles. In case you can't remember, these are the same Eagles that held the Cougars touchdown-less in a 20-3 opening loss last season.

But this week is different. The Cougar offense is rolling, the defense is surprisingly effective, and Bronco Mendenhall is coaching at a new level of excellence. At the risk of turning this into a sports blog, allow me to explain why we will beat BC on Saturday:

10. Jaime Hill- BYU's new DB coach. This guy has turned Justin Robinson (The smallest player in D-1 football) and transformed him from a joke into a bulldog. Tulsa didn't throw one pass his way last Saturday. The whole secondary is playing tougher, and more aggressive since Hill came to Provo.

9. Ben Criddle. Criddle is part of Hill's secondary. He joined the team last year as a walk-on. A walk-on, for those of you who are football illiterate, is another name for glorified hitting dummy. Nine out of ten times walk-on players are relegated to the practice squad. Ben Criddle was the tenth man, and this year he finds himself a starter at CB. He hits hard, he can tackle by himself, he breaks up passes, he's tall and he's big. A good, nay, great addition to the young Cougar defense.

8. Boston College's upset of #18 Clemson. The victory last week left the Eagles running on fumes. The overtime upset took everything they have, and they were lucky to escape with the W. Little do they know the Cougars are rested and ready to rip some new corn-shoots.

7. Jonny harline. I know what you're saying right now: Harline was a non-factor in Saturday's victory. He caught two balls. My response to you is this: He drew a linebacker and a safety on every play. If defenses are worried enough about Harline to double him up every play, it leaves the outside receivers in man-to-man coverage. Jacobsen, Collie and Allen had great games on Saturday, and Harline is just the decoy to spring the deep ball.

6. BC's secondary. Speaking of the receiving core, BC has an... unproven secondary. They gave up a lot of yards through the air to both Clemson and CENTRAL MICHIGAN. CMU (a D-IAA school) threw for over 250 yards in week one against BC. BYU's passing attack is going to stun the Eagles.

5. Cameron Jensen and Bryan Kehl. These guys should be all-American linebackers. Jensen is invisible to QBs, and Kehl has the speed and power to break up passes and chase down scrambling QBs. BYU's linebackers are their biggest defensive strength, and these two are the cream of the crop.

4. Halfback passes. Did everyone see Curtis Brown's halfback pass? What's that all about?

3. Other tricks. And what about that kickoff return? Mckay Jacobsen fielded the kickoff and he along with Manase Tonga, Nate Meikle and Mike Hague gathered in an Elder's Quorum huddle only to break free in an orgy of confusion. Tulsa didn't know what hit them. If it weren't for a holding penalty, BYU would be on Tulsa's 35 to start their drive.

2. Curtis Brown and Fui Vakapuna. They combined for 225 yards rushing against Tulsa. Fui broke 8 tackles on his way to a 38-yard run. To give some perspective, remember there are only 11 players on the defense. He ran through 8 of them. One guy touched him FOUR TIMES and couldn't tackle him. And anyone who saw Curtis Brown's 62 yard TD reception knows that this guy is something special.

And finally,

1. Watch this. http://justanotherdumb.com/byu/BYUvsTulsa2006.wmv

'Ivy league of the West'

2006-09-09T06:30:00.000-07:00

BYU ranked 19th in the list of 'best schools best price' by US news and World report. We have now solidified ourselves in the company of Harvard, Yale, Princton, etc.

Where does U of U rank?

...well they had a good football team a few years back.

Go Cougars!!

This can't be a bad thing!

2006-08-12T13:12:00.000-07:00

Football season is just weeks away, and today despite the global warming sweeping the world I felt that tinge of cool air outside that signals the beginning of Fall.

I have had conversations with Dad where he shook his head in dismay and said that BYU will never get back to where they once were. The glory days are over. I am not suggesting that the rise to glory is eminent, but this can't be a bad sign! Bronco seems to be doing all the right things. I came on to BYU during the height of Crowton and sure we had 2001 but the course that he was taking the program was like a drunk Mel Gibson speeding down the highway -- in other words it was on course to come to an ugly, untimely crash. Here's to brighter horizons and a couple of decades behind the Bronco! Go BYU! (Adam's comments are welcome)

By the way, a gratuitous check in from Dad, Mom, Aaron, Sarah, Jon, and the rest of the anti-blogites would do wonders for the health of the blog.

Update: (8/13/06) Then theres this. Is it officially time to get excited? Adam? Dad?

Discover yourself... drinking again

2006-08-11T06:51:00.000-07:00

Now that I have gone through the rejuvination machine here's this:

A breaking story about Robin Williams has the following quote: "According to Mara Buxbaum, the actor had been sober for 20 years and yet 'suddenly found himself drinking again'."

I can't help but wonder, how do you 'find yourself drinking again' after so many years of soberiety? My guess is he must have been really drunk, passed out, experienced temporary amnesia and then regained his conciousness enough to 'find himself drinking again'.

Well, I better find myself studying again.

I'm not dead yet...

2006-08-10T17:44:00.000-07:00

I feel like I have been rejuvinated by Adam's appeal. I feel like Hulk Hogan during the golden years (you know before he became 'Hollywood Hogan'). You know what I'm talking about -- he would be fighting Andre the Giant and on his last leg. Andre was squeezing the life out of him, everything was over, then... he started shaking his arm... and squeezing his fist.... just when you thought there was nothing left he's up in the middle of the ring shaking with adrenaline. You could see the look of fear in Andre's eyes - he knew he was a gonner. The audience knew it. You knew it. nobody could beat Hulk Hogan with his adrenaline going. Then he mustered one last body slam of the 400 lb. 7'4" giant.

So that is where I stand. After I saw the dwindling readership of the blog, from a base of about 10 people. I am back to raise my baby to adulthood. The blog will go on!

The rise and fall of the Olsen Family Blog

2006-08-10T11:22:00.000-07:00

It sure was a nice blog we had once. With an early push from Andy, soon everyone under the Olsen umbrella was contributing to it, and in many cases checking it multiple times a day. Even our not-so-computer-savvy parents were writing blogs! Aaron came around with a few good ones, Ali and Becky posted some great pictures, Andy finally had a venue for all of his built up politco-religious tension, and I had a place to talk about my facial hair. The Olsens were finally communicating with each other on a deep, personal level.

Now? Not.

The blog has seen very little activity lately. No one makes comments any more, no one posts. It seems that the Olsens prefer face-to-face conversation around the Sunday dinner table, to spending precious computer time writing a blog. And now Olsanity.blogspot.com sits quietly in the cold recesses of the world wide web-- a twisted end to a project that could have reunited us with our long lost brother Andy who dwells somehere in the Ohio River Valley.

Even now there are those reading this very entry who say in their minds "I'd like to post something, but..." and then they decide to check their bank account, the latest celebrity gossip, or, in my case, the message boards at Cougarfan.com.

So who's to blame for the epic demise of a once great blog? Pride destroyed the Roman empire, greed destroyed the British. What has destroyed our internet empire? Apathy. Simple apathy. No one cares any more. No one cares about Becky's disgusting freezer story. No one wants to see pictures of Ali's new house. Right now, you may be reading this saying to yourself "I don't care about Adam's unique skill with the written word." Your bored, distracted voice has been heard, Olsens. The blog is all but a deserted wasteland now.

Is it too late for our blog? Probably. But unlike most things in life, the blog will never leave you completely. The blog will always be here, ready to welcome any strays back to its fold with open arms. If you wake up one day 6 years from now and have the craving to publish your various musings, will the blog turn you away? NO. It will invite you to publish the same way it always has. Dependability.

So if anyone decides to come back, remember: it's never too late. Do it for Seth. Do it for you. Do it for the blog.

Our New House

2006-08-08T19:49:00.000-07:00

Alright everyone, it is time for the unveiling of the new residence of your favorite Hallstroms and mine. This is the front view of our new home located on Banff Lane (yes you read that right, we are moving from one confusing address to another. Don't ask me what possessed the street namers to name a street in the desert after a place in Canada. Seriously, who are we kidding here? What ever happened to cactus lane and desolation blvd. and Hades ct.?)

Anyhow, picture a lovely arrangement of gravel in the front yard and a cute white porch swing -that has yet to be purchased (don't tell Jon)- and there you have it.

What's that you say? You are dying to see the powder room by the Garage? I thought as much.There, a few pictures to spark your interest, and like the good little marketers that we are, the other pictures are coming later so that ultimate interest can be extracted.

Ad Hoc Duties

2006-07-25T09:32:00.000-07:00

When one applies for a job there is a description of that job and it usually includes the following sentence: "and other ad hoc duties as assigned." When I applied two years ago for my PR job at the Museum of Peoples and Cultures I guess I took this ad hoc thing lightly.

Allow me to introduce you to the MPC trunk freezer. In previous Olsen family discussions we have discussed the said trunk freezer. This is exactly what the MPC owns. To give you an idea about the amount of crap built up in this thing I'll give you the following information: I've been here for two years and the freezer has never been cleaned out. The girl before me was here for two years and she never cleaned it. Reptiles including frogs and lizards have been freezing since the 70's. (I thought it would be fun to see these little creatures so I opened the moldy box last week and almost lost my lunch.) A bag of tortilla chips have been frozen to the bottom and since 2000 (note Adam and I were in 10th grade at that time) Otter pop juice coats the bottom speckled with some sort of native Anasazi corn.

This all began a month ago when one of curators asked me to clean the freezer out. My position covers internal party planning and making sure we are stocked up on treats--so naturally this freezer falls under my wings since it has the capability to store food.

For days and days I purposely found myself running errands on campus or wearing white skirts or shorts or all of a sudden finding an urgent project to begin--all so I would feel justified in not starting this project.

I knew it had to be done, though. But why me? Couldn't we get the janitors to do it or a volunteer? I lure people into this museum with my writing and well-planned events...I serve a greater purpose here! I mean I knew I could handle it; I grew up in a houshold where I had to clean. I even worked in the food industry. But I was not willing to do this.

Finally, a month later I decided I was ready to take it on.

After finishing, I was bragging or complaining (I'm still not sure) to a co-worker that I had just finished the project and she said, "Yeah, it will be nice to have that [freezer] up here to de-bug some artifacts before we assesion them." I was appalled. This meant that the collections department was using the freezer...after I cleaned it!

No comment.

Our first 4th of July

2006-07-06T10:21:00.000-07:00

Honeymooners!

2006-07-06T09:50:00.000-07:00

We had the best honeymoon ever! Thanks again Mom and Dad! Aloha!

Dad...

2006-06-17T17:41:00.000-07:00

Having two boys in the family has gotten me thinking a little bit about Dad, and being father's day I thought I would post what I have learned from Dad through the years. After thinking about it, it amounts to a big list.

First of all I don't know how some people grow up knowing that their parents don't love each other. I have always known that Dad and Mom are committed to each other and that they love each other no matter what. Some people grow up aquainted early on in life with hatred, abuse, neglect, and abandonment. These are things that I experienced later in life and only through observation of others. When anything gets stressfull, or difficult in my own family I know through first hand experience to see through the difficulties, and that the sun comes up after a long night.
Dad made me want to go on a mission. I thought it was cool for as long as I can remember that Dad went on a mission to Taiwan, and he could speak Chinese. I prayed every night when I was young that I would be able to go on a mission like Dad. Dad always made it seem so cool. When I got out on my mission I realized it wasn't as cool as I always imagined it, but it was too late to go back then. (then Dad was there to pursuade me to stay and I am forever grateful to him for it.)
I remember Dad telling us in family night one evening: 'I never drank, smoked, or did any drugs, and neither should you'. For some reason as a child that made perfect sense to me - and it has ever since then also. I am very grateful that I didn't have to be told something like 'well, those were different times...'.
I remember watching Dad pay tithing and fast offerings. I remember feeling so proud that Dad gave so charitably.
The story of Dad quiting at villiage inn, and working at BYU so he could attend church on Sunday has had more of an impact on me than he realizes.
I have always invisioned Dad as a tall skinny kid who didn't always fit in, but worked hard and accomplished alot. This made me feel better about myself, as a tall skinny kid who didn't always fit it...
My memories of Dad growing up were of him working hard to give us a good life. Sometimes this meant giving up some of the things that he wanted to do. Some lessons aren't appreciated until years down the road when we are put in the exact same situation.
I've allready mentioned that Dad talked me off a ledge when I was first on a mission, but there were a few more ledges where I needed talking down from: one was when I was taking AP calculus and I was very frusterated because I was never able to do well in school, and Aaron was on his mission and couldn't help me. Another was when I was first married and I was frusterated with a tough load at BYU and I was frusterated with my microbiology class. 3-10 have occured during medical school, and I am inching my way over to number 11.
Other things that I have learned from Dad are too numerous to count, but I am especially grateful for the fun times and happiness that I was well aquainted with growing up.

Joseph Smith introduced a concept that was totally foreign to 19th century Christianity and it is something that we are still criticized for today. The concept is that we are all children of Heavenly Parents. God is our Heavenly Father and we have the capacity to return to Him and be like Him. We would try to relate this concept to people on my mission and many could only recall feelings of pain and neglect when they thought of their own parents, and they had a hard time understanding our Father in Heaven. I felt sad for them just as I feel sad for the people I interact with every day as a medical student who don't realize what it is supposed to be like. Like I mentioned I only learned how bad it could be later in life through second hand acounts from other people, but I know first hand how it should be.

I realize more and more daily how much I have come to emulate Dad from how I treat my kids and wife, to how I think. (I laughed a while ago when Isaac was trying to tell me something and I had totally zoned him out -'Dad...Dad?...Dad!') It makes me happy to know that there are now 6 little kids who will inherit what Dad and Mom have passed on. Thanks Dad (and mom). Happy Fathers Day!

The Power of the Beard

2006-06-16T08:37:00.000-07:00

The story of my beard is a long and interesting one. It starts on a clear day in May. Becky and I had just finished a photo shoot for our upcoming union, and I knew that the next few weeks would be perfect for letting my scruff mature into something a little more substantial. The days turned into weeks, the weeks turned into... a little more than one month. Pretty soon I had a whole mess of wiry black hairs, and in its maturity the beard had turned me into a man. I spent many moments examining it in the mirror-- the patches of black, white and even red hair fascinated me. Sometimes I'd even give it a tug for good measure. Whatever happened, though, I always went to bed with a smile on my face.

Friends and coworkers noticed the beard as well. My days were peppered with comments like "Nice beard," "I wish I could grow something like that," or "I would totally grow a beard but my wife won't let me." Sometimes, people who had already made a coment would look at me in wonder a few days later and say something like "Seriously, I really like that beard." It was the frequent wifal references that were most poignant, however. Upon further analysis, I realized that men everywhere are being shackled and bound by the norms of our society- and these so called "wives." My beard made every day Man Day, and I rejoiced in my new found liberty.

It is every man's deepest desire to grow a big bushy beard. Beards symbolize everything good about the Y chromosome. Look at your idols: Bob Vila, Chuck Norris, Jerry Garcia- is it any wonder that these men typify the rugged man we all yearn, nay, pine to be?

There is power in the beard; the worst thing you can do is try to ignore it. There is a sense of personal liberty and manliness that springs forth from every sprig of hair jutting out of one's face. For a few short weeks I felt that liberty, and now it's gone. But, as this baby face mocks me from the cold recesses of the mirror, I know deep down that the testosterone-laden facial hair will be back someday. And when it returns, it's sure to bring more Norris-esque manliness.

More government wasting

2006-06-14T09:34:00.000-07:00

Does this come as a surprise to anyone?

Random thoughts - and Romney/Malone ticket for 2008!

2006-06-11T12:58:00.000-07:00

Jessica and I were talking last night -- as many 'in the know' are aware 'it' couples have catchy names to be identified by. 'Tomkat', 'Bennifer', and 'Brangelinna' are some recent examples. So, here goes:

Andressica - this beat out A-Jess, or J-Drew. Although I like J-Drew a little. (street cred)
J-Ali - Jon and Ali are 'gangsta' so this goes.
Aarah - it sounds greek or hebrew or something.
Adecky? There is really no good combination here. (btw - not a good reason to pull out)
My favorite - Karline. It just flows.
Lamar and June? You tell me. Lamune? (French for the moon?)
Hyraudis - This is classic. By the way there was someone at the hospital who just got his hyraudis taken out. It was an ugly site.

Other random notes:

If anyone was hesitant to throw their support to Mitt Romney for the 2008 presidential election, the Mailman might tip you over the edge: http://www.sltrib.com/utah/ci_3924533 . 'Karl malone do what Karl Malone do'. (I still think he should have carried the torch).
If anyone was wondering how your tax money is spent try this: lifeflights to the hospital to get spork removal surgery, $500 per day cocaine habits by unemployed people on welfare, mother of seven on welfare supporting a 30 - 40 beers/day alcohol habit. This is a sample of the tax dollars in action I've witnessed in the last few months.
Is two kids considered 'multiplying and replenishing the earth' or does that imply at least three kids?

Mitt Romney - 'The Executive*'

Karl Malone - 'The Powerhouse*'

Vote Romney/Malone 2008

*'The executive' and 'the powerhouse' are registered trademarks of Xango int.

17 more days!

2006-06-07T09:48:00.000-07:00

17 more days!

Fathers and Sons

2006-05-28T18:06:00.000-07:00

I took a journey back to the old days this last weekend. It was the annual Columbus North Stake father's and Son's campout. I decided that even though Isaac is not quite prime age for camping that we would go and stay for as long as he lasts. It was beautiful. I don't think I have experienced the full meaning of being a father until I looked over and saw Isaac with a three foot dried stick with full flame blazing at the end, and waving it around to the utter annoyance of three or four men in the camp. Then in the same view I saw one of our ward members tending to his dutch oven full of delicious 'stew'. All the while he is informing us that we 'may' be able to taste the stew after he and his son are satisfied, if there is any left. (I am waving a charred hot dog over an open flame, stuck onto a flimsy willow). Later on this scouter turned charitable and offered us some baked beans cooked in tin foil and some cobbler from another dutch oven that he had nestled against his other pot. He seemed annoyed that I came with Isaac not very prepared for the campout.

I realized that there are two types of kids in the Father's and Son's -- there are the 'wanderers' and the 'fire-stickers'. Isaac has firmly entrenched himself as a wanderer. I was constantly trying to get him to stand still within my view. The 'fire-stickers' huddle around the fire and occasionaly thrust an open flamed stick right for your eye just to keep you honest. Then there are the people who ignite their marshmellows right away - drawing the indignation of the ultra-conservative majority who try to lightly toast the marshmellow about a foot and a half away from the flame. The real tension develops when the igniters catch the toasters marshmellow on fire as they draw theirs out of the fire.

Then it became dark and lightly started to rain. Isaac flipped out fearing that he would be struck by lightning. So we decided to make a night of it. Maybe next year we will stay over night.

Olsen family welcomes home father

2006-05-25T14:39:00.000-07:00

OREM-- Kelly Olsen, President of Tahitian Noni International and father of four, has returned home today after an extended sojurn in the Orient. This five-week expedition in the Far East has all but broken the collective back of the Olsen family, and they are eager to see the return of the 52-year-old patriarch.

"I learned a valuable lesson during this last trip," said Arlene Olsen, wife of Kelly, "this family simply cannot survive without Kelly."

The exhausted Arlene also said that several times during Kelly's absence she considered suggesting the family disband and join other organizations, but cooler heads prevailed.

"I thought we could do better out in the wild. Then I thought about little Greta and I just couldn't bring it up."

Kelly has traveled before, but never to this extent. The extended visits to Taiwan, Japan and Hong Kong included business meetings, training, and the hunt for valuable silks and spices. The success of the trip remains to be seen.

Back at home, however, the family needs their head now more than ever. Aaron Olsen, the eldest son, has recently made a play for power that has shocked the remaining Olsens.

"I've made it no secret that I want charge of this family," Aaron said in a statement last Wednesday. "Frankly, I think this organization needs a fresh start. A shot in the arm, if you will."

Alison, Andrew and Adam Olsen made their feelings known that their loyalties still lie with the deposed Kelly, but in the words of Andrew "[Aaron] can be very persuasive."

"When he starts dissecting words and explaining their Latin and Greek roots, I get confused and just assume he's right," said Adam, the youngest son.

It seems Kelly, like Richard of old, has returned at just the right time.

"I promise to restore order to this family," Kelly said in front of the press earlier today. "We have tolerated factionism long enough. This family will once again be united under one head."

Aaron is expected to resume his role as advisor to Kelly, however his intentions for the future remain to be seen.

1st Annual Olsen Memorial Day BBQ Spectacular

2006-05-22T13:28:00.000-07:00

(First of all I need to say sorry to Andy and Jessica for arranging this right in front of their noses. Let me just say between you and me that I'm sure this will be a lame event, with bad food, etc. I'm only obligated to go because I've been roped into arranging it, but frankly I'd probably rather rent a movie and order pizza or something.)

For the rest of you, I will say that the only limit in the quality of the upcoming Memorial Day festival will be your own imaginations. I want each of you to turn off your computers, go to a quiet place and imagine roasted animals on sticks, flames ascending from the ground, tables filled with the bounty of all creation, spontaneous choruses of dancers, weeping pilgrims who have travelled thousands of miles to present their exotic foodstuffs to crowned pharaohs. Old men gather throughout the night to sing tales of old heroes; younger men tell of their own exploits, but mostly listen; young boys sit in reverent awe at the feet of their grandfathers or play innocent games together. Women connect with each other and themselves reawaken the latent fire of creativity and love and beauty that is birthright of every human-born woman. Daughters look on and admire and learn. The very earth and sky cannot behold the celebration of their children without confirming and echoing the joy of this evening. No one withdraws himself from the gathering without the mark of the time on their faces, on their souls--perhaps we become more humble, more open to the possibility of the miraculous.

It will be a competition. No more a "cook-off" than the Pan-Hellenic games of Olympia were like a game of horseshoes. The matter will be the most ancient and celebrated of BBQ main dishes--the şiş kebap (shish-kebab). Let me explain how this will work.

Each family will prepare and bring şiş kebaps for the BBQ. At a minimum you must bring no fewer şiş kebaps than you (as a family) would eat yourselves (you may of course bring more, but no fewer). These must be entirely prepared beforehand and ready to be introduced to the grill upon your arrival. If you don't feel confident in preparing this ancient mediterranean dish, I recommend you do some research before attempting it. Basically, it consists of bits of meat (traditionally lamb, chicken or beef) skewered on a stick and divided by various savory supplementals. In modern times, many varieties have been attempted, with mixed success. Of course, at the event itself, each person will have the opportunity to sample all of the kebaps that were brought (this is, of course, how the competition will be judged--I will explain the particulars at the event), but to assure that a sufficient amount of food will be provided, you should bring as many as if you were planning on feeding yourselves entirely with your own provision (at least). And this rule should go without saying, but to make it explicit, these kebaps should be entirely the creation of one or more members of your own household (pre-prepared or store-bought kebaps will first be ridiculed, then disqualified and discarded). Also, the inferiority of your own particular kebaps should not be the determining factor in how many your family brings: you should bring the number your family would eat if they were superior-quality productions (i.e., Jon may only be able to eat 2 of Ali's kebaps, but 4 or 5 of Sarah's--this must be taken into consideration). At the BBQ every adult will vote for his/her favorite and second favorite kebap.

As well as the kebaps, each family must contribute to the common store of peripheral dishes. These include primary side dishes (of the many varieties of salads, dessert items, baked beans, deviled eggs, other classic BBQ side dishes) and secondary side dishes (drinks, chips and dip, etc.). Each family should plan on bringing at least one primary and one secondary side dish. I must say also, that, although these dishes will not be part of the contest per se, I myself could not endure the shame of having my sons see me picking up Smith's potato salad and a 2-liter bottle of A&W on my way over. As a further check, you will be required to email me before Thursday (the 25th) to tell me which dishes you propose to bring (aarono@byu.net). You will receive either an approval to your proposal or a rejection (with correction); the approved or corrected proposal will then be your food assignment (along with your kebaps). If you do not email a proposal by 5:00 PM Thursday, I will email your assignment the following day.

Following are supplemental considerations:

I will arrange plates, utensils, etc. with Mom. (Mom: email me if you don't have enough of this stuff and we'll arrange to have it).

Dad will be the chief cook of the kebaps. You will not be allowed to cook or further season your own kebaps after you have arrived and handed them over to the cooking staff. Adam will act as first assistant cook. If you have special instructions for grilling your kebaps, you may detail these to Adam who will then relay the gist of it to Dad.

We have not settled a time for the BBQ yet, but this will be posted on this site when arranged (no later than Friday).

Aaron

Interesting article in the Daily Herald

2006-05-19T05:35:00.000-07:00

I found this article in the Daily Herald: http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/179208/4/
I thought about the following verses in Isaiah 11: (12-13)

12 And he shall set up an ensign for the nations, and shall assemble the outcasts of Israel, and gather together the dispersed of Judah from the four corners of the earth.

13 The envy also of Ephraim shall depart, and the adversaries of Judah shall be cut off: Ephraim shall not envy Judah, and Judah shall not vex Ephraim.

I realize that this post isn't following the precident set for olsen posts, but oh well. Let me know if I am off base on this.

Isaac and Seth

2006-05-18T19:06:00.000-07:00

I thought I should make my appearance on the family blog. Here is a picture of Seth one week old. Isaac is loving being a big brother, and I am trying to teach him how to be soft and quiet around Seth. Right now I am just trying to get used to having two to take care of. We are all hanging in there. We are so excited for Adam and Becky's wedding in June!! Looking forward to seeing you all!!

NBA 2006

2006-05-17T08:48:00.000-07:00

I would like to be the first in this family to congratulate the Miami Heat on a fantastic series. As you may or may not know, Miami knocked off the New Jersey Nets last night in classic fashion 106-105. They won the series 4-1, and now have a much needed break until at least Sunday.

In other NBA news, how about the Suns? When Raja Bell made that 3-pointer last night to send the game into double OT, I couldn't help but think about what might have been, had he stayed with the Jazz. All I need now is the Cavs to beat the Pistons and the Spurs to come back and beat the Mavericks, and I'll be all set. I hate Dirk Nowitzki.

And now I wonder, when will the Jazz be good again? Hopefully they will stay healthy next year and develop a reliable starting core. I'm hoping Harpring, Kirilenko, Giricek and Boozer can play every single game this year, instead of their standard half.

Go Heat.

Greta is Officially Mobile

2006-05-16T10:24:00.000-07:00

Last night, Greta rolled over for the first time! I got pictures of the aftermath, and a cute one of Gabe and Greta.

That's about all that's going on here at our house besides the daily battle to keep the kitchen clean. We are also slowly chipping away at finishing our house. Right now we are finishing putting up a wainscot in Gabe's room and then we will be painting.

Blogs are amazing

2006-05-12T12:23:00.000-07:00

I want to thank Andy for introducing the family to the wonder of blogs. It's like we're all sitting together in some kind of e-room having a virtual Sunday dinner. The internet: wow.

Seth

2006-05-12T07:52:00.000-07:00

Here is our only picture of Seth with his eyes open.

Click HERE for snob quiz

2006-05-11T20:10:00.000-07:00

check this out all of you Manor House Fans (Yes I have joined the ranks). I'm 70% snob...

Two Minutes- tops

2006-05-11T19:36:00.000-07:00

Aaron- anyone can be witty when they have an hour to think about it.

"Take that, poindexter!"
-Homer Simpson

Actually it's now been an hour and 19 minutes, when I should have been doing something else

2006-05-11T15:22:00.000-07:00

I didn't realize you could put in your own title. So insert the following where the words "olsen family blog" now appear below: "Just because it's funny doesn't mean it's right. Smart humor is MINE (Aaron's)!!!"

olsen family blog

2006-05-11T15:13:00.000-07:00

I used to have a picture in my mind of an overworked medical school student, waking up at 11:30 PM to assist in surgery while memorizing anatomical terms. The existence of this blog has somewhat modified the picture. It is clear that someone is being lied to. But I'm also a little resentful of Andy moving in on my territory. Everyone in the family knows that we three brothers have fairly divvied out the genres of humor between us: Adam has TV show quotes, Andy was meant to stick with inappropriateness and "what's going on?" kinds of stuff, and smart funny was reserved for me. This may seem unfair, but as the older brother I should be allowed to choose: my sense of humor developed before yours. I was using irony and word-play when Adam and Andy were still laughing at body noises. What this blog announces to me is that some people may be unsatisfied with their lot. When I read a sentence like "He apparently wasn't drinking - he even said so," I'm not laughing: I'm thinking that this sort of understatement and false credence is a deliberate encroachment on territory I have spent years staking out. Some might say that I have been too ironic in the past (such as in letters home from my mission and so forth), but you can see now that what seemed then like thinly veiled bitterness and cynicism was merely a deliberate effort to say: "Irony--that's mine. Don't touch it or you're gonna feel it."

So let's just let bygones be bygones and return to the good old days when Andy's greatest moments were pretended ignorance of the current conversation, comic forgetfulness of names, and stories about disembowelments and the time when he bested a troop of girl scouts armed only with an axe (don't be mad at me for the visual image--I'm only giving an example of Andy's usual material--be mad at him for years of this kind of stuff). As for Adam, I'll only say that he should limit his next posting on this thing to words he has heard from a TV character (movies OK too)--having Andy afield is difficult, but I don't want to live in a world where Adam starts making up his own witticisms instead of borrowing them from Jerry Seinfeld, Homer Simpson, Chandler Bing, Felicity, and whoever the latest NBC line-up is this year.

Sometimes smart humor looks abusive, you may even wonder if it's funny at all, but THAT'S JUST BECAUSE YOU DON"T KNOW WHAT SMART HUMOR IS. I do. Hands off. Witty humor is just another name for smart humor. I'm yelling now, but that's how I feel about this.

Aaron

PS: It just took me an hour to do this, so I probably won't be adding anything else.

Baby Seth

2006-05-11T08:49:00.000-07:00

Seth Thomas Olsen was born at 8:45 am on may 10th 2006. He was 7 pounds 13 ounces, and was 21 inches long. He is doing really well and I will try to get some pictures up as soon as I can. This picture gives you a general idea of what a baby looks like, although there are some key differences between this baby and Seth.

*

*Picture not actually representative of baby Seth

I'll post pictures as they become available.

Congratulations

2006-05-10T13:13:00.000-07:00

I just want my first post to be in congratulations to Andy, Jessica and Isaac for their new arrival. Mom told me the news today. I am glad that everything went well. Let me be the first to welcome you to the crazy life of two kids! Post a picture soon so we can see little Seth.

New Hairstyle

2006-05-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

Alright everyone, I'm heading to the Hair Salon tomorrow, any suggestions?

2006-05-07T17:52:00.000-07:00

Who the heck is this joker?

2006-05-07T10:02:00.000-07:00

Patrick Kennedy U.S. representative from Rhode Island showed us over the weekend the dangers of taking prescription medications - even at the correct dosages. I just wanted to get this out so you realize that the next time you are taking 'prescribed medications' that you know the potential side effects.

Police witnessed Kennedy in his car at 2:30 in the morning traveling at a high rate of speed in a construction zone and also swerving into the wrong lane of travel with its lights off. He finally hit a curb, swerved back into the wrong lane and ended up in a head on collision into a barracade. He apparently wasn't drinking - he even said so. Although police suspected that he was under the influence of alcohol, they were instructed not to give a sobriety test. You can get the full story here: http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/05/05/kennedy.accident/index.html

Why am I posting this on the Olsen family blog? Especially with Dad wavering, and comparing it to a complex mesh of email? I think that he is a national hero. He has shown us an example of how to confront your problems head on and not to be afraid of saying 'I am totally incompetant to carry on with my job at the present time'. I think that we should all take a page out of his book.

Another question for the select few who care-- (Jon, Adam, maybe Dad -- or am I alone on this?) Does Kobe make the rest of his team stink, or are they just bad to begin with? I have a theory that Kobe actually makes other people worse than they really are. Its as if he dribbles down hoists up a 40 foot three pointer and you can see Luke Walton and Lamar Odom daydreaming about their carribean cruise. Was Luke Walton on the phone with his travel agent during a timeout in the third quarter? (am I the only one that watched the game?)

What is the difference?

2006-05-05T17:54:00.001-07:00

Please tell me what the difference between an e mail and a blog is. I'm sure I'm missing something here but seems to me that a blog is a fancy name for an e mail, just harder to get.
Dad

What is the difference?

2006-05-05T17:54:00.000-07:00

Please tell me what the difference between an e mail and a blog is. I'm sure I'm missing something here but seems to me that a blog is a fancy name for an e mail, just harder to get.
Dad

She's published

2006-05-04T10:53:00.000-07:00

I would just like to announce that my fiance has officially started her career as a journalist. If you'll notice, Today's (Thursday, May 4's) edition of "The Daily Universe" contains an article on page 11 written by none other than Becky "The Liontamer" Shippen. Becky, your in depth and revealing coverage of the deals and offers one can expect during Women's Conference has stolen our hearts. Congratulations.

...and here's another picture.
Me and the boys at a Cake concert. (Mom and dad- cake is a music group. Don't worry about it.)

2006-05-04T04:06:00.000-07:00

Ok guys. I want this noted that the most firmly entrenched anti-technology person yet living is at this moment doing something I never thought would happen: writing a blog. (Did I say that right). I am at present in Tokyo having already been in Hong Kong and Taiwan. In two weeks, I have seen the sun twice. Had a great birthday, Hilton room service spaghetti and Peanut M&M's. Tomorrow I'm going to Sapporo to view our newest office in Japan then on Saturday back to Taiwan. I loved the photos of everyone, it makes me feel a little closer to home. We went to church in Hong Kong and Taiwan in brand new chapels built in each place. Beautiful big buildings like the one in New York with multiple chapels, residences for Mission Presidents etc. and offices. The one in Taiwan was built on the site of the first chapel in Taiwan. This chapel was pretty new when I was a missionary and I had some very fond memories of it. In fact, the block that the church owns in Taipei used to contain the Mission Presidents Home, Mission Office, Institute building, Office Elder's apartment and chapel in separate buildings. Now on the same plot there is the Temple and the new Admin/Chapel building. Nothing left from what I remember. This year is the 50th anniversary of the church in Taiwan and there are many events planned this year. I'm hoping that the next time I come back I can attend a reunion for all missionaries planned in late summer.

I miss you all and hope you are all doing well. I hope this gets through.
Dad

Someone's a year older today!

2006-05-03T22:57:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

DAD!

I figured this deserved it's own post

Blogging Tutorial

2006-05-03T22:35:00.000-07:00

ok, Just in case there are a few of you out there that aren't sure how to post (not the same as commenting) here's an easy way to do it:

Type www.blogger.com into your address box. when you get there, at the top right hand corner is a place for you to log in. Once you have done that it will take you to your "Dashboard" where all of your blogs are listed. Click on Olsen Family Blog and it will show a list of posts. when you get the urge to blog (and please give in to that urge often), click on "Create" under the tab "posting." then you can do what I am currently doing at this very moment (well, not when you are reading this). Once you are done, and any other time you feel like viewing our blog as we all know and love it--just click on the tab aptly named "view blog."

Hopefully that isn't too confusing--and now no one has an excuse for not posting. So go for it! And anyone who has the opportunity to talk to Dad, find out what's holding him up...

If there are any questions just type up your question in a comment and I'm sure someone will help out.

Also, I don't mean to insult anyone's intellegence, I just thought I'd be helpful. Plus, I wanted an excuse to post another picture and request more funny hospital stories from Andy.

This is a picture of Gabe and "Church Luke" around Christmas time.

Oh, and Aaron, remember when you were trying to figure out who says "Take care of yourselves and each other?" I just heard Jerry Springer say it on a commercial the other day. Hmmm... I wonder what that says about Aaron's "free time spent reading." Like you expected us to really believe that you can read that much without falling asleep. Oh the Horror.

Ok, I'm done.

You can't resist the revolution!

2006-05-01T17:42:00.000-07:00

Kudos to Andy for boldly taking a step into the electronic age. I, for one, am eager to embrace this new blogging age. Viva la revolucion de los Bloggitas!

Not only will this allow me to express myself via the written word, but I can also display stunning photography like this:

For all those who miss my greasy hair and beard, don't worry-- after the wedding I'm gonna be all man, baby.

For now, though, everyone will have to accept the boyish good looks of my youth.

Here's another picture of Becky and I. I like this one because it shows Becky's wild side.

Engagement Love

2006-05-01T10:44:00.000-07:00

Although we've hit our 55 day mark on the wedding countdown I thought I'd share some old news…our engagement story.

February 17, 2006

Adam and I always celebrate February 17th...it was the day we first kissed. We went up to Salt Lake City for dinner at The Roof and to see the new Joseph Smith movie. I had no idea when Adam was going to propose in fact, I was a bit confused because he went all out on Valentine's Day and kept alluding to the fact that it was going to be "a while." After the movie we walked around Temple Square. Being near the Temple the subject of our future naturally came up. But not realizing that it was Adam's segway into proposal I started asking him what he thought about the movie. We continued talking and then it finally dawned on me that he was going to propose...I felt his legs shaking. He then got down on one knee and proposed.The rest is history.

What the...?

2006-04-30T18:42:00.000-07:00

Did you know that the grammaticly proper way to use those periods is in a set of three? There's also an actual name for them but I can't remember--I'll have to get back to you on that (I'm sure you will all be on the edge of your seats waiting).

Well, I just saw "GrandmaO" as a new contributor, so that hopefully means that Mom is on. Mom--if you really are out there, write or comment on something so that we know it's working for you.

I think this is going to be fun as soon as we are all on.

So I'll go ahead and give the latest Gabe and Greta update: Gabe has taken to riding his bigwheel and scooter (seperately) at high speed down our driveway and onto the sidewalk (there's a very precarious turn at the end that he manages quite well) where he then proceeds to the nearest neighbor to chat with. It's very cute and I think all the old people around here just love it. He is also saying "What the...?" lately--it's pretty funny.

Greta is hopefully starting to sleep through the night, it has taken so long because it has been hard to let her cry it out at night. It's safe to say she has me wrapped around her little finger.

Well that's all I have to say, let me see if I can get a picture up. Well that was easy enough. I'll have to take a new one of Greta and post it later.

2006-04-30T18:11:00.000-07:00

Isaac and his dog Thomas in our backyard.

Sporks, zippers, and Isaac's fight...

2006-04-30T17:21:00.000-07:00

Lets get this blog rolling!

For those of you who are wondering how in the world a grown man could fit a sport (spoon-fork) in his throat, let me describe the technique -- because I saw it firsthand. I was on call last Saturday night and we got a call from the life-flight helicopter that a prisoner was on his way with a spork stuck in his throat. He arrived about 11:00 pm accompanied by 2 guards. I interviewed him and he said that he was responding to voices that he was hearing that for some reason (that seemed to make sense to him) were telling him to swallow things. He also said that he had a buddy who, not to be outdone, managed to swallow a spork, a zipper that he ripped off of his prison jumpsuit, and a ball point pen. He was to arrive around 12:30 am. At this point I realized that I earned a neuroscience degree from BYU and underwent three years of intensive medical school and my career path ends up with me pulling utinsils out of prisoners throats. As the final spork was pulled we turned our backs on the prisoner congragulating ourselves on a job well done, and he lunged for a siringe and stuffed it down like it was a vienna sausage....

Yesterday, Jessica had a shower so Jarren Smith (yes THE Jarren Smith) and I took the kids to the park. As we were talking the kids were all having a great time playing on the playground. I even noticed that they had met some new freinds. 'This is good', I thought. Then as I was talking to Jarren I looked up and saw that a little kid was being banged against the slide by a MUCH bigger kid. I took a double take and realized that it was Isaac who was being roughed up. I wish I could have taken a picture of this kid and posted it, the kid was huge. He wasn't much older, but he was approaching 100lbs. So Jarren and I ran toward him screaming and threw the kid off Isaac. After I consoled Isaac, I noticed that the kid was crying. He was just a big misguided kid. I felt sorry for him. I spent the next 15-20 minutes trying to make freinds with the kid and his dad, but it was just an awkward moment. It reminded my of my first and only fight. I was giving Robert Eyre a hard time as we were running the mile in fourth grade. After the run, I threw in one more jab at him, and he had had it. He turned around and clocked me in the jaw. I fell down. I recovered but Robert was inconsolable for the rest of the day. He knocked me to the ground and then started crying like a baby. The moral is: like father, like son. We Olsen's can't really defend ourselved very well but man, will you feel guilty if you hit us...

Olsen Blog

2006-04-23T18:35:00.000-07:00

Announcing the Olsen Family Blog! ( we also accept posts from the hallstrom family after they have undergone a rigerous screening process.) Post at leisure and keep comments in line!

2004-08-26T09:01:00.000-07:00

2003-03-26T15:49:00.000-08:00

2003-03-26T14:53:00.000-08:00

what is the reason that Jon is snubbing this blog...
	he is too busy to get involved
	he doesn't care
	Andy didn't send him an invite
	Andy spends too much time with this stuff

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